Journal Entry ~ 06/30/19

To you I lift up my eyes, O you who are enthroned in the heavens!  - Psalm 123:1

God wants us to cry out to Him when we’ve had enough, but He also wants you to acknowledge who He is. Far too many of us cry out to God, asking Him to rescue us, but we still expect it to happen on our terms or according to our plan. We want what we want and we want when we want it and how we want it - and we bring those requests to God, expecting Him to fulfill our requests. 

When He doesn’t, we end up even more exhausted. When we lay our struggles at His feet, it means we are accepting our current circumstances exactly as they are, and trusting He will rescue us in a manner that is for the greater good of all those involved. 

I have been so guilty of this in my life - even recently. As I watch my son continue to struggle, my prayers have been growing increasingly fervent for his peace, his comfort, and his salvation. But every day that passes, life just seems to get harder for him. And I just want it all to stop because the pain of watching my child suffer through hopelessness has been an exhausting burden to carry. I want to put it down. I want it to be easy for him...so it can be easy for me. I would be lying if I said I haven’t cried out in frustration to God these last few months. 

But it’s in these moments that I must acknowledge who God is. He is the One enthroned in the heavens. He is sovereign over all things. He has a plan and it is for our good. Even when we don’t understand, even when we only see a small piece of the whole picture - God is sovereign. All of our requests, all of our fervent prayers, all of our tears and frustration - they must all be thrown at that statement. God is sovereign over all things. He has a plan and it’s for our good. 

He knows my heart - He knows how it aches to see my son free of the chains that bind him, He knows how I long to see him surrender his life to the One and only King. I believe He has heard my prayers for mercy for years, and I believe He answers prayers for those who love Him. So I continue to wait, and I lift my eyes to Him, trusting in His sovereignty. 

Just as the psalmist does in this psalm, we must hold these two things in balance - our cries for mercy, and our acknowledgment of His sovereignty. Both must exist in equal parts for us to find that peace we long to know. If our cries are louder than our praises, we’re looking at the wrong things.


Press on ~ you are loved 💗

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