Walking in the Word with Breast Cancer

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 10 "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."  - Jeremiah 17:9-10 So often we try to look at our situation through our own lens, through our own eyes....We try to figure out our trials through our own limited understanding. But I've learned, His ways are not our ways. We can't always look at our situation through our limited lens because our hearts are deceitful. We hide what’s truly in there because we’ve been conditioned by the world to believe that we have certain rights or we’ve been conditioned not to trust.  Sometimes God allows us to be thrown into a pit - not because we were being picked on, but because we’ve been picked out. He allows a difficult person or a difficult trial into our lives because He knows we have a darkness in our hearts that needs to be revealed. He will continue

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 10 "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."  - Jeremiah 17:9-10 Many of us have experienced the deep joy that comes from being in the center of God’s will - it’s when we’re serving others, when we choose obedience over rebellion, when we’re loving sacrificially, when we lean in and listen over turning away, when we’ve done the hard work of learning from our trials, when we finally confess and repent of a sin we’ve hung on to for far too long, when we forgive a deep hurt we’ve been carrying, we experience His abundant blessings in our lives. It’s in these times we have an overwhelming sense of His presence, His comfort, and His strength. The joy and the contentment in these moments is simply unmatched.  But the opposite is also true - when we are feeling unhappy, when we’re struggling to move on,

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 10 "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."  - Jeremiah 17:9-10 Jeremiah understands what we all need to grasp a little better - sin starts in the heart. Sin doesn't exist on the outside, it exists on the inside. And if we're ever going to recognize a difference in our lives, we have to allow the Spirit to do the hard work of cleaning out our heart.  The truth is, our hearts are not naturally open to criticism. None of us like to be confronted or questioned. It’s why our defenses rise when accused - even if there is truth in the accusation. We will work hard to defend our position or our reputation, and convince others of our righteousness rather than humbly listening to what others have to say. If we have been misjudged or misunderstood, we will pull out our catalog of righteous acts in

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 10 "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."  - Jeremiah 17:9-10 Our God is consistently searching and testing our hearts and our minds. He can see past the strongholds that cause our responses and into our true motives. We are often blind to those motives. We think we know what causes us to respond in a certain way when we’ve been injured, but we are often truly blind to the sin that lies deep below the action in our heart. He wants us to see that sin, and He wants us to be rid of it, so He gives to every man according to His ways, according to the fruit of His deeds. In other words, He’s allowing into our lives the difficulties we need to root out the sin by revealing to us the darkness that lies deep with our hearts.  Some people struggle with this truth. They think surrendering their lives to

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 10 "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."  - Jeremiah 17:9-10 Try as we might to point our fingers to a person or a situation in our trial, the Bible is quite clear about where the problem exists. We all suffer from the same terminal disease - no one has escaped it. We can try to fool ourselves or justify our actions, we can become masters at blaming others for our struggles, but it won’t take away the truth. There is simply no denying the hard to accept, but crystal clear message of the Bible: we are our biggest problem.  The trial you are struggling with is because of you and only you. The difficult situation may have been brought on by someone or something else, but you remain in the trial because of the sin that lives in your deceitful heart. We are the ones who need help, we are the ones w

9 The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 10 "I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds."  - Jeremiah 17:9-10 The heart is deceitful above all things, which means it’s hard to admit a problem we don’t see. Our hearts hide our flaws from us - flaws others see so well, but are hidden from us. We are so self-focused and we do such a great job of justifying our actions to ourselves that we don’t see the wrong in them.  We like to convince ourselves that our anger tells us more about the flawed people we do life with than it tells us about ourselves. We like to think our impatience tells us more about the poor planning or lack of character in the people we engage with than it does us. We like to justify our sin by blaming it on the world around us.  When we talk about what is wrong in our lives, we have a tendency to point to the other people

but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  - Isaiah 40:31 When we wait, we find His strength. I found this to be particularly true when making difficult life decisions. I think sometimes we feel the pressure of needing to make a decision immediately, but God calls us to wait on Him sometimes. I’m such a solution orientated, problem-solver, that my tendency when a problem presents itself is to look for a solution then move on it as quickly as possible. I am the opposite of a procrastinator- I don’t ignore them, hoping they’ll go away. I throw a solution at them to resolve them as quickly as possible. But I have learned the hard way - when we feel the need to make a quick decision, our heart may be taking control.  When we wait on Him, and allow Him to guide our decisions, we find the strength to stand through those difficult decisions. Several years ago,

but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  - Isaiah 40:31 Ever dealt with circumstances or people that have left you totally drained and lacking energy in your service for God?  I have. Although I try hard to support and encourage people, there are times when it seems like everyone in the world needs my attention.  Don’t get me wrong—I love to help.  But sometimes you get to the point where you can’t talk to one more person; there’s nothing left to give.  You need a strength that transcends your own. When we are feeling drained or exhausted, it’s an indication that we are working on our own timeline, not God’s. God would never create an agenda for us that leaves us exhausted. He created a timeline for Him that specifically has time in it to renew our strength in Him. He set aside a whole day of rest for us.  The world would tell us that we don’t have

but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  - Isaiah 40:31 We want to be filled with His strength, so we are learning how to wait for the Lord this week. We know we need to dig down under our impatience for the issue that's driving our difficulty in waiting. When we uncover those heart issues, we need to confess and repent. My personal struggle beneath my impatience is fear and control.  When I turn to scripture about fear, there is an intentional connection to gratitude. Years ago, when I first realized the depth of fear I had, my life verse was "do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." Philippians 4:6. There is so much strength in that verse for me, I just need to see it and He reminds me of all He has taught me through it.  We are told to

If we want strength, we need to wait on the Lord.  If we want to be people who wait on the Lord well, then we need to develop our capacity for patience. That's not possible in our own power.  We know God is sovereign over all, which means we know He intentionally places us in every situation or trial for a very specific purpose - even, especially those that try our patience - and we know it's all ultimately for our good. So, we know if our patience is being tried, we know He's trying to transform us and grow us - ultimately to build our capacity for patience and to give us His strength.  So, as I mentioned yesterday, if we want to grow in strength by increasing our ability to wait on the Lord, we need to dig deeper into our hearts in pursuit of the cause of our lack of patience. When we find ourselves struggling with patience, we need to stop and ask ourselves why. What is really going on here?  Why am I really upset?  When I dive deeper into different situatio

but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  - Isaiah 40:31 Waiting is the hardest part, but it is also a most critical part in the transformation of our hearts. Without the waiting, God cannot do the sanctifying work He does in our hearts. The moments we are waiting - whether it's in a line of traffic or for our child to accept Christ - are powerful opportunities to welcome God in and keep our hearts renewed in him.  Waiting is part of His plan for us. But we can't simply become a more patient person by thinking we should. We can't just determine we are going to be more patient because that's biblical and we want to be Godly in our conduct. That strategy may work for a little while, but chances are good you will fail and end up back where you started because you never really took care of the problem. In our own power, we simply cannot be m

37 Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; 38 therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest." - Matthew 9:37-38 The Harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. We have been saved for one purpose and one purpose only - to bring glory to God. Our job in the time we have left on this earth is to work for the Kingdom. There are so many who still need to hear and understand the message of the Gospel, but so few people willing to work for Him. And many of those who do work for Him only give Him a couple hours a week.  As we grow to be more like Christ, our priorities should align with Him. What do you think His number one priority is?  To save the lost. That’s the most important thing to God. His desire is to see every single person on this planet come to know Him - every knee will bow. Is that our first priority?  Is that the most important thing that we think about from waking to

but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  - Isaiah 40:31 Waiting for the Lord means He will give you strength. I have never waited well. I'm a doer, not a "waiter".   I also extremely solution oriented - I see a problem, and I immediately go about brainstorming solutions, then I pick one and go.  I move through those steps so quickly at times that I often frustrate the people around me. Couple that with the fact that I tend to be a fairly organized person who can be extremely efficient with my time and my processes, and you've got someone who doesn't wait well. Waiting wastes time, I'd rather get stuff done. I'm that person who brings a bag of work with me any time I have to sit in a waiting room because I don't like to "wait", I like to do.  Now, none of that is necessarily bad.  God created me to be an organ

but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  - Isaiah 40:31 Weakness and weariness are simply part of the reality of living in a fallen world and in a fallen body. We spend so much energy fighting that weakness and weariness, but we simply need to go to Him for the strength we seek. I've learned if I just take the time to spend with Him, I not only find strength to make it through the day, but peace and joy abundantly.  As women, we live a life of sacrifice for our families - we forfeit most everything at a moment's notice if somebody needs something from us, especially our children. Many of us find ourselves weary from trying to keep up with the demands of our schedules - schedules often created to satisfy or take care of our families. I don't know too many women who are exhausted from running around, filling a crazy schedule to satisfy themse

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 The eyes of our Lord are looking over the earth for people to bless with His strength, but He's looking for hearts who are blameless toward Him. The reality is that none of us are blameless - not on our own, at least. The only reason we can be considered blameless is because the perfect righteousness of Jesus Christ covers us as God sets His eyes on us.  So many of us spend so much time trying to become blameless in the eyes of the Lord. We see a list of attributes in scripture, and we think we need to do those things. We determine to be more loving, to be more patient, to serve others more. The problem is when we try to do these things apart from God, we fail. We end up exhausted because we working off our agenda and not His, we end up feeling self-righteous because we’re serving others without any return, we end up o

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 Why have we spent so much time this week looking at the rights we need to lay down?  The Lord is searching the earth for people whose heart is blameless so that He can give them strength. The reality is our hearts are not blameless when we're holding on to our rights because these rights are a place our hearts hide our sin. Some sin is easy to spot - stealing, committing adultery, etc. - but we all know some sin is quite deceptive and hides deep in our hearts under the justification that we have a right.  God knows many of us desire to know Him deeply, and I believe because He knows that, He has presented many of us with some significantly challenging situations to expose the hidden sin in our hearts.  He knows our desire is to confess all of our sin. We can't confess the sin we don't know about, so He will pla

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 When I assert my rights, I forfeit grace. When I am feeling weak or exhausted, angry or frustrated, desperate or lonely, fearful or discouraged, when I need His strength, it's time to search my heart for the right I need to give up. These words have really struck me this week, and I've pondered them constantly.  Yesterday, when my son didn't respond to a situation the way I wanted him to, I got frustrated. With this message on my mind, within moments I started looking for where I needed to give up my rights. I don't have a right to determine how other people respond, I don't have a right to determine how other people feel, I don't have a right to object when people choose a different perspective of a situation or opinion than mine. Writing that all down sounds so silly - of course I don't have t

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 When we're struggling through a valley, when we're stuck in a trial that's long and hard, when we're exhausted because of all we have to do, when our fears and our anxieties have crept in to take over our thoughts, we know to cry out to Him. It is in those moments, we desperately need His strength. We will fall to our knees in prayer or we ask others to pray for strength for us, and then we wait for it to show up.  But if we're not willing to do those things to bring His strength rushing in, all our effort and prayers are for naught. He isn't just going to grant us strength if we're not willing to do those things we need to do to bring His strength. When those prayers go unheard, many of us end up frustrated - we may feel like He's not answering our prayers or that He's left us alone, an

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 When I assert my rights, I forfeit His grace. So when I need His strength, I should look for those places in my life where I am asserting my rights. I think the hardest one for me to give up is the right to be heard and understood. Nothing gets under my skin more than when I have been falsely accused - it happened again yesterday. Somebody thought that I said something, and rather than coming to me and asking, they came at me with an attack. I was blindsided, and immediately rose up in defense. I didn't give them an angry response, but I did defend myself strongly in a conversation that lasted about 20 minutes. I walked away frustrated because in the end, there was no resolution. She walked away thinking I did something I didn't do - the reality is I did the complete opposite of what she thought I did and actually adv

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 Many of us get caught in the trap of wanting to be the best mother, wife, employee, daughter, friend we can be...so we work and we work and we work. Our schedules get packed and our anxieties rise because we don't want people to think less of us or because we want the very best for the people we love. We want to give our best, so we give it all.  If we're not doing for someone else, we're worrying about how we're going to help someone or fix a problem. We generally put our own needs last, leaving the care of our physical needs or spiritual needs at the bottom of the priority list. Far too often in life, as women, we can find ourselves exhausted and stressed. There is nothing wrong with wanting to give our best, or with serving others before ourselves, but when it happens to the point of exhaustion, it’s an

For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to give strong support to those whose heart is blameless toward him. - 2 Chronicles 16:9 What an amazing verse to meditate on for the week - I just love the truths locked up in this verse. God is looking for those He can give His strength to, but He's not looking for people who are working for Him, He's looking for people who's hearts are blameless. HE’S the great worker. He’s the one with broad, burden-bearing shoulders. He’s the strong one. And He is looking for ways to show it.  We have such a tendency to want to take on the work and do it ourselves. We spend so much energy worrying about how to get it all done, or how to fix the problems in front of us. Just stop. He doesn't want you to do it all. So what does He want from us? Not what we might expect. He wants our hearts to be blameless. He wants our anxieties, our needs, our cries for power to do His will. He wants us to confess our sin a

27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. - John 10:27-28 These promises are precious to me. Your life changes in the moment you give your life to Christ - the Holy Spirit comes to dwell in you and you are never the same. It's an unmistakeable moment that begins to define who you are. It is at that moment we begin to hear His voice, and we begin to follow Him.  I know there are many professed Christians out there, those that say they are believers, but still who do not hear His voice. You hear His voice when you truly give your life to Him - you can't help it, He moves to live inside of you. When I gave my life to Christ, it was through a simple prayer when I was alone, and I didn't really know what I was doing - "I gave in to a God I didn't know."   But He knew, and He snatched me up into His hand, never to let me go. It’s

27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. - John 10:27-28 When we have an eternal perspective, we know God wins in the end. Scripture tells us over and over that Jesus Christ is and will be victorious. We can bank our life on that truth. Jesus is going to win. And holding on to that knowledge can help us get through the darkest valleys.   When we think about times of trial in our lives, if we really pinpoint what’s most difficult about the trial, it’s the not knowing. The biggest reason why we fear, doubt, despair, and falter is that we don’t know how it’s all going to end.  We imagine the worst, and fear grabs hold of our hearts and takes us on a ride. Every one of us lives with the uncertainty of life, every one of us have deep rooted fears that live on the edge of our thinking and never really go away.  If we just knew how it was all going to end,

27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. - John 10:27-28 What is so beautiful about this verse is that it's promise should bring us joy. As we reflect on an eternal life with Him, it should cause a shift in our thinking. When you take an eternal perspective on your life, it changes the way you see your trials and your day to day challenges.  Keeping our eyes focused on an eternal perspective can get our thinking to a place of joy, no matter what we may be facing in life because an eternal perspective takes into consideration His bigger plan. Our joy is a result of knowing and believing He is at work, even when we don't understand it. A supernatural delight in the purposes of God means you know there’s something bigger going on here, something so far beyond the temporal that’s unfolding according to God’s plan. And we can always take joy in God’s

27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. 29 My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand. - John 10:27-29 We are sheep because God acts, not because of anything we choose to do. God chooses us and transforms our hearts, which inclines us to love what Jesus loves. He takes out our hearts of stone and puts in a soft heart, he breaks our pride and humbles us to the God-exalting truth that He reigns over all.  It is no accident that we are called sheep: we are not wise in ourselves; we need a shepherd to save us and to guide us.  There are some of us who are tempted by Satan to question whether or not we are His sheep, but it is in our response to the verse that we can find the answer. "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me." When He speaks, if you

27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. - John 10:27-28 It is hard to overemphasize what a tremendous privilege it is to be known personally, intimately, lovingly by the Son of God. It is a precious gift to all his sheep, and it contains within it the promise of eternal life.   He knows the specifics about each one of us individually - He doesn't just know our name, or know about us. This kind of know is much more personal. He would be able to pick us out in a crowd of thousands just as you would be able to pick out your best friend, your own child, or your husband.  He knows our heartaches and our joys, He knows our desires and our downfalls.  The creator of this big, beautiful universe with all its mountains and oceans and stars, knows what's weighing on my heart today. What a thought to meditate on!   Just a few verses before this one, H

27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. 29 My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father's hand. - John 10:27-29 It is such a privilege to meditate on this truth...He knows us individually, personally, intimately. He knows each of our individual desires, joys, fears. He knows what each of us need to feel protected and loved, to feel content and peaceful, and He knows what brings each of us joy. He knows our every thought, He knows our deepest secrets, He knows what motivates us and what makes us tick.  He also knows our fears and our failures, He knows our grief and our struggles. He knows our weakness and our idols, He knows our distractions. He knows our heart better than us, He sees those places in our hearts that we can’t even see.  And with it all, He wants the very best for