Journal Entry ~ 05/19/19

But overhearing what they said, Jesus said to the ruler of the synagogue, "Do not fear, only believe." - Mark 5:36

So many of our sins are rooted in fear - pause and think about it.  We lose our temper when we’re trying to get out of the house in the morning and our littles won't move quick enough...what's the root of our anger?  Dig, and you'll find its because we don't want to be late.  Keep digging, and you'll find fear at the bottom - I don't want to be judged by others as a mom who can't handle it all, I don't want my boss to get mad at me. Fear of man is at the root. 

We get angry at our teens when they are defiant - trace it to the root and you'll most likely find fear that they won't turn out to be successful, happy adults or you don't want people to judge you based on your adolescent’s behavior. 

I could fill pages with examples of how fear is at the root of so many of our sins - we fear loneliness, we fear judgment, we fear losing our loved ones, we fear losing respect, we fear pain, we fear trials, we fear.  So often, fear is the sin for which we need to repent...but we're not. We're confessing the surface-level sin, and that leaves us trapped in the sin-confess-repeat cycle. 

Example - we lose our temper at our kids, we confess our sin of losing our temper - to our kids, to our God, but we're right back at it the next day or when we find ourselves in a similar situation. The problem is we don’t dig beneath the behavior and repent of the sin that lies underneath. If we don't dig down and find the underlying fear and repent of it, He can't do the work He needs to do to change us. 

As I have prayed for the salvation of my sons, God has worked on showing me the deep-seated fear I have in my heart, and as I am repenting of it, I am finding freedom. As I work on confessing the sin of fear, it has begun to surface less frequently and with less intensity - which means fewer of the other sinful behaviors rear their ugly heads. Less anger, less despair, more peace. As I’ve grown in my ability to uncover and confess my deep rooted fears, I’ve found the freedom to be able to watch God at work in situations I’ve wanted to control. He so often comes in to resolve a situation in a completely different manner than I could have imagined, and that is increasing my faith that He is good. 

We need not fear, we need only to believe that He is in control. 

Press on ~ you are loved 💗


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