Journal Entry ~ 05/20/19

But overhearing what they said, Jesus said to the ruler of the synagogue, "Do not fear, only believe." - Mark 5:36

When we fear, we dishonor God and we give power to whatever holds our fear. We become slaves to the anxious thoughts. Fear distorts our thinking and causes unfaithful behavior. Our only hope in stopping that cycle is to confess and repent of our fears, then believe. 

That's an easier word to type than it is to put into action. I have repeated those words to myself as a mantra over the past weeks and months in my current trial. Watching my son slip away under this recent diagnosis is the most difficult trial I have ever faced. I am powerless to change the situation. The specialists offer no hope and have admittedly said there is no treatment that truly offers a cure. Short of a miracle, he will most likely suffer with these symptoms the rest of his life. Having lost about 30 pounds in 2 months, my son is physically and emotionally fading away. He has lost the will to live under these circumstances. He has no fight left. Fear has overwhelmed me most days these past 2 months. 

How do we believe when fear is overwhelming us?  We work to spend more time focusing on His promises than we spend focusing on our fears. We must capture our thinking when it's running away with fear, and remind ourselves that His promises are true and they are for us. We need to surround ourselves with people who will point us back to Jesus when the fears overwhelm us, and who will remind us of His promises. It doesn't matter where we're from, or what we've done...it doesn't matter how we ended up in our current situation or how impossible it seems. None of our weaknesses disqualifies us from the promises He has made us. There is nothing that is too difficult for our Our Father in Heaven. 

God made us some promises and He doesn't lie. He loves us with an unending love, and He promises to work all things for the good of those who love Him. He promises we will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living, and He promises to provide a way for us to prosper. All we need to do is believe. I’m choosing that over and over these days. 


Press on ~ you are loved 💗

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