Journal Entry ~ 10/25/19
but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. - Isaiah 40:31
When we wait, we find His strength. I found this to be particularly true when making difficult life decisions. I think sometimes we feel the pressure of needing to make a decision immediately, but God calls us to wait on Him sometimes. I’m such a solution orientated, problem-solver, that my tendency when a problem presents itself is to look for a solution then move on it as quickly as possible. I am the opposite of a procrastinator- I don’t ignore them, hoping they’ll go away. I throw a solution at them to resolve them as quickly as possible. But I have learned the hard way - when we feel the need to make a quick decision, our heart may be taking control.
When we wait on Him, and allow Him to guide our decisions, we find the strength to stand through those difficult decisions. Several years ago, I had to make one of the most heart wrenching decisions of my life. It involved one of my adult sons - my desire was just to protect him and keep him close. God has revealed to me that my children are my idol in the past, so I knew enough to question my decision, but my heart was clinging tightly to keeping my son close. My husband and I discussed the decision, and made the choice to wait on it and pray. We both decided to seek counsel from several different people, then we would come back together to discuss. The whole process was foreign to me because I simply wanted to make the decision to solve the problem and be done with it. But I knew the right decision was to wait, to pray, and to seek counsel.
Seeking counsel on all accounts revealed God wanted me to make the opposite decision I wanted to make. He wanted me to let my son go. My heart was broken. I knew it was the right thing to do in my head, but my heart just wouldn't let him go. My heart wanted to be in control, to keep an eye on him, to continue to take care of him, to ensure he continued to walk the path toward salvation.
Again, I needed to wait. During that time, I prayed fervently for my heart. I didn’t pray for God to let me have my way, instead I prayed for Him to move the mountain of hurt in my heart that would allow me to make the decision He wanted me to make. I simply could not do it until He did. I remember being very intentional about waiting to make the decision until God moved that mountain and both my husband and I had peace about the decision. I had to completely surrender my heart to Him.
I found His strength in the waiting. Because I completely surrendered to Him, He did move the mountain. My husband and I both woke up one morning with an overwhelming sense of peace about our decision that only could have been supernatural. I have never once questioned whether it was the right decision.
There is strength in the Lord when we wait on Him for a decision.
Press on ~ you are loved 💗
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